by force?

i thought i had very liberal parents but turns out the older you get, the more conservative they become. Make that provincial. They are as provincial as...as...hmmm, drat provincial...they are just so old fashioned right now.
They will not stop praying for me to get married even when i tell them, from the bottom of my bottomest heart that i have no intentions of getting married.
What a typical rant (for a woman my age).
My parents were supposed to be so cool that i wouldn’t ever need to rant about this. They are supposed to laugh with me when people out there say i need to get married so i can be fulfilled. They are supposed to tell me those people are so old fashioned. They should not be asking me to reconsider, or suggesting i go to some deliverance prayers with them, so my heart of stone may be turned to mushy pink. They are supposed to be on my side not his!
The boss-bosser-bossest of them all at my gulag summoned me to his office via my father. He said i should go discuss the next step in my career, so off i went armed with my career plan, and updated cv. So, last Friday, here i am seated across from him waiting for great wisdom to fall upon me and this huge mahogany desk separating us. He asked how i was doing and quickly interrupted my rehearsed response to tell me he had recently met with my father. (Yeah dude, that’s why i’m seated here) he asked about my career plan (thank God i hadn’t wasted my time forging one the night before!) and just as this meeting was going pretty well, he asked if i am dating. (Huh?)
Looks up at me when i remain silent and reassures me he is only asking as my father would. Hoping i could ignore this fluke of a question, i waited eagerly for the next question about this amazing non-existent career plan of mine. No way dude was going to allow to be ignored. He insisted on asking if i am dating, “or are you the strict kind of Christian that does not date” (by the way, what kind is that?) My defences went up.
“no, i am not that kind of Christian” i said but did not say whether i am dating or not. Mr boss then asked how old i am. I thought, ok, normally i feel nothing about my age, but my dear digits were obviously going to lead me down a mothers’ union gutter. And i was right! He put my cv down and said “you should get married!” i laughed. He didn’t laugh. I coughed.
I should what? He was serious. He asked me why i am not married yet, told me i should develop the social side of my life too. That i should not focus only on the career part and forget the social. Said he is concerned like any parent would be, and i should know there is a fulfillment that comes from marrying and having children ESPECIALLY FOR WOMEN...“ So get married!”
What? Especially what? I stopped smiling at this point but he didn’t notice. He was so deep in his wisdom he forgot to check for positive reception.
I was very disappointed. I am still very disappointed.
He went on and on about the great pleasures of marriage. I listened in ... i still can’t describe the emotion...
This guy said i shouldn’t get anxious about having no children at my age. Told me how many he had had by my age, and said it will happen (children and marriage) for me too. In the same breath, he told me to get aggressive...to get out there and make it happen (how please?)
So much for a career plot! Get married? Have children?
No offense to those who are married, and/or have children but, is it really this hard to believe that some people do not want children, and God knows they do not plan to get married even though they are as heterosexual as can be?
How many of these “get married!” lectures are my going to have to go through before people let me be?
How many times do i have to say “who freaking cares!” when people say they will laugh if i ever get married and have children? So what if i do? So what if i swear i will never and then turn around to? Iz human, iz fickle..get over it!
But seriously, i still can’t get over Friday morning’s lecture (i haven’t even recounted it properly here).
Eh eh?
I also still can’t get over the look in my mother’s eyes when i finally told her my funny story. She had a polite smile on, but her eyes asked “what’s wrong with what he did?”
It is a disappointment that in this century, i will still be prayed for because i do not have a husband or children. Why don’t people pray about things that really matter, and leave me to ‘waste’ my uterus and those other things men like? Is mine to waste please.
I can tell my parents to bugger off when they bring up marriage and children, but how to tell off their friends...(nanti i was brought up nice).
Get married indeed!